Author: Joanna (sandsofvulcan)
PREMISE: An answer to this challenge - Saavik and SPock meet for the first time after their goodbye in ST 4.He still does NOT remember her clearly. Why and how do they handle it to start a friendship again? Does he regain his memories or do they start over? Set it before or after ST 6.
Saavik strode behind Amanda in deference as they wound their way
through the throngs of Vulcans at Space Central. Across the terminal
Sarek emerged from the diplomatic lock, and was engulfed in a sea of
reporters eager for first hand news of the events of the past few
days. Vulcan reporters in the rear made way for Amanda as she moved
towards her Husband. Sarek reached for her and addressed the
"You will attend the formal press conference arranged for 0400
tomorrow. I make no comment until that time. If you will excuse me,
I will take my wife home."
"Will your son be present at the conference?" they begged.
Sarek paused. His fore and middle fingers still pressed to Amanda's
in greeting. "My son remains with his crew. He is assigned to his
new starship post effective immediately, and will be unable to
Saavik turned to follow Amanda, and felt her arm grasped around the
bicep. Sarek had reached back to ensure that the reporters did not
envelope her. As he released her, he cast his eyes at the place
behind him in silent command. Saavik stepped into the place he
directed, even as she glanced questioningly at Amanda, who only cast
her eyes down; a slight smile playing on her lips, and took the spot
Amanda had said that ordinarily, they might shuttle to the surface.
She and Sarek would be allowed the privacy of a small enclosed
compartment to catch up on the time they spent apart. She joked that
she enjoyed meeting him on his return, as much as he enjoyed
complaining that it was illogical and a waste of her time. Old and
frail, she complained that what little time she had left was hers to
Today Sarek led them to the VIP transporter facility and had them
beamed to the private transporter unit he had installed in their
home. When they had arrived, Saavik turned to leave, sensing that
they wanted privacy, but Sarek stopped her with a question.
"You have seen Healer Sorel?"
"Yes," said Saavik, wanting more than anything, not to have to turn
back and face him as Vulcan etiquette demanded.
She did manage to turn but still could not bear the possibility that
the news would be a disappointment to him. "I do not bare a child,"
she said as she cast her eyes down.
"Sorel is concerned?" asked Sarek of Amanda.
"Saavik is perfectly healthy," she paused knowing that was not what
Sarek wanted to know. "He wishes to examine Spock. He can not say
whether there is something wrong, or if the regeneration of Spock's
body has caused a problem."
Against all Vulcan mores, Sarek reached for Saavik's chin, gently
drawing her up to face him, as he would teach a child to show proper
"I grieve with thee, Saavikam," he said.
Saavik drew in her breath sharply; surprised that he should so
quickly be able to identify what she had not. She knew that she felt
grief at Spock's inability to clearly remember her, but that was not
the grief to which Sarek referred. She should be pregnant. She had
thought that she would feel relieved at Sorel's report, but her
meditations had revealed otherwise.
"We will dine together tonight," he nodded, refusing to allow her to
escape their grasp. "And afterwards we will discuss your future."
"And does our Son send any greeting at all?" Amanda asked lightly.
"Only that he feels fine."
After being placed between them at the spaceport, and the touch of
Sarek's hand on her chin, Saavik felt herself pulled towards the
event horizon of Spock's family. She wanted to resist, and at the
same time knew that she had no where else to go. Spock did not
remember her. She had been dismissed from the Academy, and commanded
by Starfleet Medical to repatriate for a month on her homeworld. She
had been through too much to argue the injustice of it.
If they wanted to send her home then she should be in the stars, not
on Vulcan, not on any world. But Medical had insisted that such a
young officer undergoing such a traumatic experience spend time at
home, regardless of where she considered that was. Her records
listed Vulcan, and she was to remain here for one month before they
would consider any other posting. Even more cruelly, Kirk's crew was
being assigned from available officers now. Being temporarily
relieved of duty meant that she was ineligible.
Now at the dinner table, Sarek drew her in relentlessly, offering
her the first taste of the merhhav'e he had prepared. A guest would
not be offered a taste at all, but served after Amanda had approved
it. That he wanted her approval confused her, and yet as before, she
allowed it, accepting the offered bite, and nodding.
Dinner was consumed quietly, Sarek emptying his riman bowl before he
spoke, releasing them for conversation.
"Your time of service has begun. It is of course deferred for those
who reside off planet, but now that you are here, you should
consider fulfilling your duties."
Amanda's eyes brightened at Sarek's suggestion. "That is a wonderful
idea, Sarek. My mother used to say that helping another was just the
thing to get your mind off of your own troubles."
Saavik looked at them as they conspired against her, but again
acquiesced when she found she could find no flaw with their
Every Vulcan adult was required to fulfill one month of public
service on Vulcan every year of his life. Her own service had been
deferred while she was at the academy, but now with no obligations
of her time for a month, she was free to repay at least part of her
debt. After lastmeal, Saavik perused the online database for
acceptable postings. Most postings in the area of Shikahr were
requests for help for the elderly, or infirm. Saavik was not adverse
to this sort of posting, but out of curiosity, widened her search
parameters until one posting stood out.
The Institute for the Transmission of Vulcan Culture was seeking an
instructor for a period of one year. This was more service than
Saavik owed, and she almost passed over the listing until she caught
a glimpse of the description. Duties would consist of guiding six-
year-olds through the mind training necessary for the achievement of
their first melds on the eve of their seventh birthdays.
Something about the listing drew her in as Amanda's words at dinner
came back to her. Saavik had lost her teacher. Perhaps he would
never remember what he had given her, but what better way to return
his gift than to teach another child
She scanned the page, and found the certainty that would keep her
from this position. It required a reference from her than'tha.
Saavik had been discovered almost feral on an abandoned Romulan
Colony. Spock had rescued her and worked intensively with her for a
year afterward. During that year he had prepared her for her first
meld and then served as her than'tha and performed the meld with
her. But now he did not remember her. A reference would not be
Sarek's study was a throwback to Earth's nineteenth century. Amanda
had designed it for him early in theor marriage when it seemed that
if she did not, he would never leave his office in time for lastmeal
with her. She could do nothing about the stone walls and floors, so
she had concentrated her efforts on wood, something that was too
expensive on Vulcan. She had her father's antique mahogany desk and
matching bookshelves shipped from Earth. She longed to have the
matching leather library chairs with their tack accents sent too,
but she knew that her vegetarian husband would not like having to
stare at "animal hide". She substituted an overstuffed chair with a
floor lamp so that if he would not stop working and least she could
join him and sit in his comforting presence.
"Thank you for what you did at the spaceport today," Amanda said
from her chair.
Amanda knew the comment would get his attention. Sarek looked up
from his and gave the response Amanda knew was coming.
"One does not thank logic, Amanda. The reporters would have
separated her from us."
"You placed her between us. Do the reporters have the ability to
change the meaning of what you did?"
"No, Adun. She saved the life of our son. She deserves to walk in
the place of our child."
"I do not disagree, Aduna, not at all." Amanda watched him as he
scroll through the pages on the screen on the desk in front of him.
He seemed to find what he was looking for before he looked up again.
"I am concerned for Spock." This was a greater admission than Amanda
thought that she would ever hear. Even as Spock argued with the
adepts at Seleya that he must return to Earth with his shipmates,
Sarek had not interfered. She had confronted Sarek afterward.
"How could you allow him to go?!"
"He is of age and no longer under my control Amanda. I understand
his need to stand with his friends. As soon as he has done this, I
will insist that he return to complete his retraining."
"And what if Starfleet interrogates him? What then? The Selayans
have warned us of what may happen. We may still lose him."
"Leonard understands that forcing Spock to access those memories
could result in the psychosis discussed by the healers. He has
promised that he will not allow it on medical grounds. No one will
probe the events surrounding the separation of Spock's katra or the
time he spent on Genesis. These are the memories that could prove
dangerous. Much of his other knowledge has returned."
Amanda glared at him. "Knowledge! It's his memories that should
concern you. We have no idea what he remembers of his past. Oh he
remembers our names, and that we are his parents, but does he
remember what makes Spock himself. Does he remember his kahs-wan? Or
that he saved your life on the Babel Mission? Does he remember
T'Pring? Or most importantly, Saavik?"
Sarek allowed her tirade before he answered, concern in his
voice. "And how do we broach that particular subject Amanda? She was
on Genesis. How we ensure that in asking him to remember her, he
does not remember push himself to hard?"
Amanda chewed on her lower lips as she considered Sarek's question.
"I too desire to know what he remembers of his life. Perhaps this
will prove a place to start?" Sarek turned his viewer to face
Amanda. As Amanda read, her face broadened into the grin that let
her husband know that he knew her too well.
"It would be good for her."
"It would indeed, my wife."
As she joined Sarek and Amanda for firstmeal, Saavik sensed that
something was wrong. Amanda smiled and served her. The meal was
consumed in silence as tradition demanded, and Sarek, draining his
riman bowl, began the morning conversation.
"I have arranged a position at which you may fulfill your service to
Saavik choked as she finished the last of her riman. She began to
open her mouth in protest, but Sarek was not finished. "There is a
matter of the references, but that has been arranged as well. Do not
concern yourself with it further. I expect a response in a matter of
Saavik looked to Amanda who looked over her bowl and smiled slightly
as if there was no discussion expected.
"Yes, Sarek, I am capable of choosing a position myself. It is not
"You are, of course, but as head of household, I have chosen to take
care of the matter myself. to free you for more time with Amanda.
She says she is taking you to see some of the historical and
cultural sites with the city today. I find that this will be at
least as beneficial as the time you spend in service. You are
Vulcan, Saavik. You will come to know Vulcan. This is your home."
Saavik had forgotten what is like to have things arranged for her.
Spock had taken care of all of the details of her young life, from
her schools to her foster families while she attended those schools.
She had experienced so much recently that it would be easy to allow
herself to be directed for a while. At the same time, she was a
woman now, and the thought of giving up control, even to one as
beneficent as Sarek, was difficult.
Lest she be allowed to consider her desires further, Sarek
added, "While I respect your career as an officer in Starfleet, on
Vulcan you are not yet of age. The decision is my responsibility."
Suddenly a month was beginning to seem like a long time.
Leonard McCoy sat on the end of Spock's bed in his cabin, and
considered himself lucky to have cornered Spock in his cabin at all.
"May I remind you, Doctor, that while a ship is in dry dock, day to
day operations are the responsibility of her first officer?"
"Dammit, Spock. Its two days. Give the man some leeway. He
practically designed you."
"Doctor, the healers examined me thoroughly on Vulcan. If Healer
Sorel wishes to know my physical state he may inquire of them."
"You know very well, that those healers were concerned with your
mind. Sorel wants to know that your regeneration has not altered any
of the genetic coding that his team put in place."
"You can obtain whatever samples Sorel requires, Doctor. I cannot."
"I cannot. Sorel is an expert in Vulcan hybrids because your birth
made him one. There's no way that I know enough to be useful to him,
nor do I wish to know you that well."
"You're going." Spock raised an eyebrow at Dr. Leonard McCoy even as
he reached for the comm button.
"And before you call Jim, look at the signature on the orders." The
miniscule rounding of Spock's shoulders told McCoy that at least
this time, he had won.
Amanda sat on the edge of her chair in the study as Sarek ended his
conversation with Sorel.
"There is no change, my wife. Sorel's report, based on samples of
Spock's blood taken immediately after the refusion, suggests that
physical stress may have caused an incomplete cycle. If allowed to
undergo a full pon farr, Sorel believes that the genetic ability to
procreate will manifest itself."
"He can have children."
"That is what I said, Amanda."
She wandered the paths of her garden at a leisurely place, knowing
where her son would be. As predicted he sat on a secluded bench
hidden from view by an overgrown bank of helrulas vine, it's golden
yellow flowers withering in the late evening sun.
"This is your favorite spot as a child."
"I remember," Spock said as Amanda heart leapt. She eased herself
onto the bench next to him.
"What Spock? What do you remember?"
Spock faced her, a look of reminiscence and pain in his eyes. "I
came here when E-Chiya died, and grandfather. And now that I have
died, I come here as well."
"That's because it's peaceful." Spock faced lightened. "What you may
not know is that I planted these helrulas for you. One particularly
bad day, when you came home from school, and had obviously been
crying, I came out here and planted and planted because it hurt me
so to see the other boys treat you that way. I wanted to make a
place for you own where you could go for peace, and without knowing
I had done so, you gravitated here whenever you were troubled."
"Where is she?" he asked.
"I sent Saavik away for the day. I needed to talk to you about what
she needs. for her future."
Spock sat silently, head bowed, before he looked up at his
mother. "I remember this," he said pulling a holopic from his
robes. "I brought it to show her. I thought perhaps she could share
more about this time with me."
Amanda smiled and took the picture. "I called you almost everyday.
She was a lovely child; so spirited and curious." Amanda handed back
the picture of a much younger Saavik and her two grey-skinned
friends from the year Spock had spent on Dantria IV.
"When I saw her after the refusion, I knew that I should remember
her. I searched my mind at that time, but there was nothing, except
the logical conclusion that she was one of my shipmates. I found
this in my living quarters. I believe I remember this time."
"I was her teacher." Spock made the statement in a tone that was
both firm and questioning.
"You were. She will be pleased to know that you remember this. She
returns in an hour."
"I will be here."
Saavik took the picture from Spock's hand; his eyes a question.
"I can remember no more. I have searched my mind for their names,
but I can only recall that they are male."
"The Boys," said Saavik. "That is how their mother referred to them."
"The incidences you recall are correct, T'Kehr." Saavik was careful
to refer to him as teacher and nothing more. She too had been warned
of the danger of bringing up the events on Genesis too soon.
"I am no longer your teacher, Saavikam. My mother has asked me for a
reference for your service at the Institute for the Transmission of
Vulcan Culture and I have given it."
"How did she know that I desired that posting?" asked Saavik
"You will find Saavikam, that both my mother and father know you
better than you think."
"Experience?" she asked.
Saavik felt the edges of her mouth turn at the comfortable humor,
but Spock's countenance too quickly regained its serious bent, and
she withheld the smile.
"I regret that I can recall no more than this time in your life. My
mother says that I was also your sponsors to the Academy, but this
has not returned. She would not tell me more."
Saavik did not know how to respond. Though her disappointment did
not show on her face, she quickly dropped her eyes away from his.
Like his father, Spock reached and gently tipped her chin up with
his hand. Saavik's eyes revealed nothing.
"I was your Than'tha; the first to touch your mind. Surely it would
be safe for you to allow it again. I know that my lack of
remembrance grieves you."
Saavik pulled away slowly, exerting all her control to keep his
delicate embrace from detecting what burned in her. Instead her
action caused his brow to knot together in confusion.
She wanted to scream, to tell him of all that had happened, of their
time together on Genesis and what she had done to save him, but she
was a Vulcan and said only what must be said without inflection or
desire to save his mind and all that he was.
"No, my teacher, it is too soon."